January 21st-24th Time with South Africans

Jan and Ada

Today (Friday) we had a surprise!   Laurie said she was taking us somewhere and would not tell us where.  It turned out we went to see Ada…the lady who was our house help when we lived here.  In the 4 yrs we were here we developed a close relationship with her and her family including having a Christmas party for her family.  She is a strong Christian so we had that in common…other than the fact she adored my kids we did not have much else in common.  At that time she lived in a “shack” with husband, daughter and niece…and 2 grandkids…a simple life most of us would not “get”.  It didn’t matter.  We loved her family and visa versa.  

Ada, Nothemba and Jan

When her home burned down our family got some wood to make another house and made sure they had water to their home as she had been carrying it about ½ mile.  Not to say we did great things for her...we didn’t…but there is so much we could do to help and we were glad to.  It has been hard to stay in touch with her due to poor mail service and after a couple years we had lost touch with her.  Well Laurie had recently found where her niece worked and so we picked up Notemba and she took us to see Ada.  She lives in Temboletto…. it used to be called black townships but they are now communities.  What a fun and sweet reunion we had with her.  She is now in a very small brick home that is warm and has more than 3 rooms instead of 2 (the shack was 8ft x 30ft) The shack is still behind her house (providing a home for a relative) and they still don’t have indoor plumbing (as in toilets).  We believe there was water in the Kitchen.

Roger showing Ada's grandson some pictures

It was fun to show her photos of our kids grown up and talk about the things that happened when we were together and the things that have happened to them since then.  It is hard to wrap my mind around the hardships of their lives…health issues that are put on hold due to crowded hospitals…daughter dying of cancer, likely a result of AIDS…a son in prison for what seems to be a false accusation etc.  It’s must be rough.

Ada is caring for the 3 yr old grandson from her daughter who died.  Ada has diabetes and heart problems...most likely has had a mild heart attack from what she described…she is older than I am…not sure how she does it. 

Ada and some of her family

So I cried as I left but also rejoiced that we could say if we don’t see each other again here…. we will fellowship at the throne of our God together in eternity!!

Victoria Bay

When we got home we decided on the spur of the moment to head to the beach.  We had a couple hours till we would be going out for dinner.  Laurie came with us and we had a great swim at Victoria Bay.  The waves were great fun.  Of course it took a little while to brave the cold water but once we were in it was great.  So nice to be so close to the beach! 

We had decided to go to an Indian Restaurant owned by someone Laurie and Dean know.  Wow ….it was good.  We all had different types of curry dishes and really enjoyed it.

Saturday…. It was raining all day and we had a low-key day.  We were able to Skype with Eileen and Lucas and Jamie.  The time difference to the states is trickier to connect but hoping to catch up with Ben and Sarah soon:)   I have been missing my kids lately more than usual…I think it’s the familiar surroundings and they were part of our life here before so. …lots of memories.  

Saturday evening we went to some friends for a braii…Des and Sue Mueller.  They were one of the first people to show us hospitality in George and have us over after we came here.   They don’t remember it clearly but we do.  They have now moved out of town so were a 30 min drive away.  They live off of the Brak River...someone said they live at the end of the river…or the beginning…not sure which…I think it seemed to be a stream off the main river…guess I should research that a bit:)  The river flows into the ocean but winds thru marshlands and tidal pool areas so the river they live by ebbs and flows with the tides.  It was a beautiful spot!  Dean and Jason went on a long canoe ride before dinner…. we sat and enjoyed the view and talked, catching up on 17 yrs!  We were treated to an amazing sunset and as it began to get darker we were wondering just how far Dean and Jason had gone but they got back before darkness really settled in (about 8) and began cooking the meat then.  

With Des and Sue around the Braii

The braii they had was so cool…in the center was the metal part where the fire/coals go and there was a grill on top that could be lifted up and down on a pole…and around the outside was a “table” about 18-24 inches wide….perfect for sitting around and eating at.  The whole frame was on wheels so it could be moved around even with a fire going in it…maybe these are common but I had never seen one…I thot it was genius…after the meat was cooked and we were all seated Des put more wood in the fire pit and so it was like camping and sitting around the fire while we ate.  It felt good since it was getting chilly.  We had potato salad, baked veggies in a creamy cheese sauce…bread…and lots of meat…several types of sausage (wors) and steak and chops and bacon wrapped chicken livers.(ugh!) etc…they love a variety of meat when you have a braii.  It was a wonderful evening and we stayed way to late but the hospitality was just as good as I remembered:)   They are a very special couple.

Sunday we went to Patria fellowship.  There were several people we knew there and the fellowship was refreshing.  The rest of the day was low key and relaxing.  We played games and just sat around talking….some more…you would think we would run out of stuff to talk about.

Preparation Time at Edwalls'

Monday…Roger and I spent most of the morning going over the marriage presentation we were going to be doing in the evening.  It was fun actually to work on something like that together.  We walked to town in the afternoon (it only took about 7 min) and went to get some copies of the handout made and also we got prints of photos we took at Ada’s house so I could give them to her.  We easily found a store that did these things and it was very busy…nonstop people coming in for various needs.  That is because it is not as common here for people to have their own computers, copiers and printers at home so they go to the shop and have them done.  So it took awhile…then we walked to Options which was nearby and met Laurie…we all stopped by the pizza place to put in an order for dinner and picked it up and hour later.  Pizza delivery is not a common thing and when it comes…its on a bike or scooter.

Presentation on Marriage

So we ended the day with the presentation on marriage.  There were 12 couples which was a nice size group…the most that they said would come would have been 22 couples.  That would have overwhelmed me for sure.  We had a good time sharing and after I got over the initial jitters I was able to talk with out shaking :)  It was a very informal time and the couples seemed to enjoy it and opened up and shared when we had discussion time.  At the end people came to say goodbye and there was one man who had obviously not really wanted to be there at the beginning who came and said he was glad he came and now “he knew his marriage could work”…not sure if that was due to the info or seeing us having been married 33 yrs and still working on it...or both:)  That touched my heart and made it worth it all.  There were couples married only a short time and those with many years of marriage and the group included people from different ethnic groups. There was one lady who had come alone and during the couple breakaway time she was left sitting alone so I went and asked her what her story was….she has been married 12 yrs…her marriage is in a bad way and she and her husband were about to break up when she got pregnant.  He never wanted children but the first reaction was to stay married because of the baby but now he is saying why bother since the baby will suffer due to their poor relationship etc.  She became a  Chistian not to long ago and her life changed so much that it was hard for her husband to accept and so he now rejects anything to do with the Lord and spiritual things etc. (please pray for them).  I was able to pray with her but my heart was also breaking for her …so much pain in this world.  But we know that our Lord is in the business of changing lives so we will continue to pray for her as well as each of those couples we shared with.

As much as I enjoyed doing the presentation…it also totally wore me out and I came home and crashed…I used to call it post group leadership syndrome when I first started facilitating women’s Book study groups…But I loved it even tho it wore me out!!